07.30 | 07.22 | 08.01 | 08.06 | 10.17 | 10.27 | 11.19 | 11.25 | 12.09
Subject: You’ve received a Hallmark E-Card!!!
Just kidding. Sidebar: Poor Hallmark. They must be just sick.
OK. Perhaps the last blog until I settle in the new place. I’m about to start tearing all the electronica apart to get ready for the move. And this time…..this time I’m gonna do it right. All the cables neatly wrapped and labeled, all the discs carefully stored, everything in a proper place so that when it’s time to re-assemble it all – no problem.
Yeah. Right.
Got my last Theoni haircut this afternoon. Driving back from her place I flip on the radio:
All the leaves are brown And the sky is grey I’ve been for a walk On a winters day I’d be safe and warm If I was in L.A. California dreamin’ On such a winters day…..
Yep. On the radio. Never mind what station.
Meanwhile – BEHOLD!! The power of pop music and I am suddenly back in 1966 when I first heard that song and now….I’m feeling it again for the first time.
Got to get to California. Don’t know anything about it really…except the Beach Boys surf there (not interested) and The Rivieras did that one about California Sun but I burn so easily. Never was much of a “suntan beach guy” guy.
But…
Dunno. That speaks to me. Winters Day. Safe and Warm.
Since that first time, I’ve heard California Dreamin’ a thousand-PLUS times (no exaggeration)
But today - driving home from my haircut…hearing that song on the radio makes me crazy.
Crazy with a BIG smile.
“I’d be safe and warm…” sounded so good then.
Now?
“I’ve been for a walk on a winters day.”
PERFECT! Sorry. I digress.
What I wanted to say:
Listen, pals: And I DO mean PALS.
It’s been great. Thank you.
Best- Dave
Thanksgiving - aka “The Last Supper”.
We’ve always done T-Day at my place. The Core Group. The “A” List. This will be my last. Robin says I have to dress up (a first) for the photos. We’ve always taken the T-Day pictures but THIS one…we have to do fancy I guess.
Same plan as always – food’s assigned. I do apps (clear out the freezer) and rolls, Mike & Elin provide the turkey, stuffing, potatoes and gravy, Alejandro does his AMAZING “Broc-o-lishus Casserole”, Robin’s got dessert and Rich and Bill? They are The Yams Mans.
There’ll be lots of wine and champagne and other diversionary substances. (chocolate.)
Wine pours and Apps are served at 11:30A. Dinner at 3.
Mike will spend most of the day in “Attaway’s Getaway” (the bedroom) in a recliner facing the plasma TV….with the phone within reach….for football. We’ll check on him every now and then.
Elsewhere, Buddy and Holly (dogs) running the front and backyard. The rest of us - sometimes with the dogs, other times watching movies in the living room. “Home For the Holidays”, probably “Breakfast At Tiffany’s” (again) and maybe “Auntie Mame” too. I’m going to campaign for “Pocketful of Miracles.”
At some point Robin, Elin and I will go through boxes of photographs to see if they want any of this s!*t before I move to Michigan.
This group: M&E and Rob and Jandro and Rich&Bill and I – we got history for sure.
But – Elin, Robin and I - we go way back to when we all first came to the Bay Area. Lots of stories, lots of smiles. We’ve grown up together. They are my family.
Thanksgiving will be very special this year. I hope the food’s good.
Best to you and your family-
-Dave
Dave's Blog: 10.27.08 - Brrrrrrrrrr
HEY. I know it snows there. Thanks to all for emailing the Michigan weather forecasts.
Please know:
1) I got this guy up the road….he’s got this plow…. 2) Where I’m going….the snow stays white. 3) I do have central heat and a fireplace.
Have you ever crunched through fresh snow at night - plenty of light from a sky full of stars… the only sound - you and the wind and the Lake.
Eh? Have ya???? NICE! Youbetcha!! Also - the sauna is on and will be ready when we get back. Wanna take a hot tub first?
Sold the house. Booked the moving company.
Got the Rand McNally out and have planned the drive back. It will be the Southern Route. I hope to have enough time for a couple side trips…including The Salton Sea. I want to visit The Salton Sea before I die and this seems to be the perfect opportunity. Also want to do a little Route 66-ing.
It looks like I’ll be spending Christmas Eve in Sullivan MO., planning on dinner at the Do Kum Inn. I am very much looking forward to being on-the-road over the holidays. I love driving – especially solo – and Solstice Time is the BEST.
Hoping the movers take their time so I can take mine.
I will be at the new place in time for Jeanne and Bud’s Annual New Year’s Eve Weenie Roast. A tradition, I hear and I am honored to have been invited.
We are GO. I am JAZZED.
Thanks for the well-wishing emails and phone calls.
And - to the mean guy who wrote such nasty things about the Midwest….read this:
Just woke up from my 6 month nap and noticed your announcement; envious for sure, but happy for you. For background, 11 years ago, after spending 10 years in the Bay Area, we moved back to Chicago, my home. To serve as a dose of reality, this weekend's chores included: 1. Firing up the snow blower for its long awaited appearance (I much prefer snow-blowing to mowing; no sweating or avoiding the dogs attempt at "organic fertilizing", plus, the neighbors don't get pissed when u crank the Jacobsen 5 hp up at 5:30 am); 2. Put the storms back into the sunroom. By the time I was done, my fingers had a hard time grasping the screws; 3. Last rake job of the yard. If anyone is seriously considering the value of spending $80/month @ the health club, c'mon out and rake for an hour. The only thing missing is the anorexic instructor with the boom mike screaming over the latest release from some Idol cast off; 4. Reviewed the Cub's prospects for the upcoming campaign. Once complete with my analysis, I turned to dog Wrigley and proclaimed that '09 WILL be the year. Really. 5. Went for a bike ride and, after lounging around the house for the better part of 2 hours, I can confirm my toes are back and functioning. All that said, we enjoy the hell out of this town. It is nice to go home. Safe travels and continued good fortune and success.
p.s. If you are still in need of that drink when in Chicago, let me know.
That’s from Pete.
Dave's Blog: 10.27.08 - I Need A Drink !
I Need A Drink.
First – Thanks to everybody who’s emailed and called since the announcement. I had no idea. You don’t know what it means to me…to have made such a personal connection with so many people. That’s what makes radio so unique – to be one-on-one with thousands simultaneously.
Does that make any sense? Anyway - I am honored – truly.
Can we all get together for a chat (and probably a couple cocktails) before December 19th?
OK. Business as usual.
Saw “Religulous” on Sunday. Bill Maher’s take on the current state of the world’s religions. Hilarious and scary too.
I had to go someplace for 3 hours…real estate open house…so I went to the movies. Yep - The House….my home since 1986….is officially on the market.
Little bit of emotional happening. There’s so much of me and Mike and Alejandro too…in that place.
At the advice of my realtor, hours before the sign went up I made the rounds to tell each of my neighbors.
First stop – the newbies – next door. They settled in about 2 years ago. Nice people. Quiet. Friendly. He’s very cool, she’s really sweet. I surprise her in their garage - she thanks me for being such a great neighbor. I thank her and….if they know of anybody who wants to buy a very reasonably priced….well, lemme know.
Next. Across the street. Young married couple with 2 really cool kids. Their place is all decked out for Halloween. I ring the doorbell and Pia (Mom) answers. I get about 5 words out and Emma and Gavin (the kids) are at the door with Mom. Gavin’s got his cowboy hat on - he runs out the door and points at one of the Halloween decorations and spells out: “E-E-K”
“E-E-K. That’s “EEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKK!” I says, in the best girly voice I can summon. Back at the front door, I tell Emma how pretty she is. That’s my standard line with her – she is a knockout and she seems to like it when I tell her so. Emma’s the one who made me that very cool candy dish a couple years ago. I tell Pia I’m moving….the house is going on the market and I wanted to announce in-person before a sign went up.
Suddenly I’m welling up and I hate that. I love living near kids. The sound they make when they play….it’s wonderful. I’ll miss that.
Next stop: Guy next door. He was here when Mike and I bought the house in ’86. He’s 2 years retired now. We have a brief chat about what a great neighborhood this is and how lucky we are to live here. People in back, people across the street, next door (me) ALL great!
Still gotta talk to John, and Pete down the street….and the guy who’s a MAJOR Foghead but has always had the class to respect my privacy.
GREAT neighborhood. Always a “hi”, sometimes a little more conversation if you want it. Everybody keeps an eye out for each other. And we welcome all types. Every ethnic, all ages. I hear there’s a queer DJ on the block too!
Just keep your lawn cut, please….and Thank You!
More later---
Dave's Blog: 10.17.08 - The Master Plan….
Writing the first line of this – that’s the hardest part. Let’s just jump into it and say:
I’m retiring. Wait. That makes me sound really old. Let’s try:
Dear Fogheads, After much thought, I’ve decided….
Nope. That’s going to sound like we’re mad at each other.
How about this? Memo format:
To: All From: Me Re: The Master Plan.
It is time to announce my retirement…EVEN THOUGH I AM NOT THAT OLD. My decision. Last show for KFOG will be Friday, December 19th.
Here’s the deal: I’ve been thinking about this for a couple years. Thanks to excellent planning and despite global collapse of the financial industry, I will be able to realize a dream I’ve had for a long time.
I’m leaving the Bay Area – returning to Michigan. It’s hard to explain to someone who’s not from there so I won’t even try. I think y’all know how I feel about the Midwest.
I’m pretty much done with radio although I will be doing 10@10 and other stuff for KFOG from the luxurious state-of-the-art home studio located on the 2nd floor loft of my lakefront villa.
Mostly though – I’m gonna watch the sun rise over a Great Lake, smoke cigarettes legally, read, bicycle, work at the library, explore the Upper, write, do some pirate radio, walk the beach, screen movies for friends, rake leaves, grow green beans, motorcycle, think about stuff, visit old friends, make new ones, shovel snow, take pictures, wait for thunderstorms, and….and…………
It’s been a great run. 26 years with KFOG. That’s something I’m very proud of and grateful for.
I’ve always been lucky that way.
The past few years…working with Peter and Greg and Renee. It’s the best. I will miss them. They are family. People say they love KFOG’s Morning Show because we sound like we really like each other. I’m telling you now – that ain’t no put-on. I think I can speak on behalf of my co-conspirators – we have a GREAT time. 4 people living and sharing totally different lifestyles and we are each so much richer for have knowing the others.
That’s my take on it.
And the others at KFOG?
The BEST!
Lots of smiles. Occasional drama too. I think I’m gonna miss that the most. Daily chats with Raquel and Joe and Karynann and Kelly and Benson and Sheri and Andrew and Steve and Kerry and Chuck and Special and Brian and….
THIS list could go on for pages and pages.
Let’s cut to:
Over the years I’ve worked with and learned from great talents at some of the bestest radio stations. The resume is pretty short compared to the average DJ. Not much bouncing around after the first 3 years. WLAV, WSAI, WDAI….and KFOG. Also: WAFT, WMAX, WZZM, WKTM, KSFX. 9 stations in 40 years of radio. Oh. Wait. WOAK, 89.3 FM—Dondero High School makes 10. And let’s not forget Cincinnati Community Station WAIF where I worked with John Zeh on the Gaydreams program. He’s the one who got in trouble though.
First commercial radio appearance: A 10th grade field trip to WWJ Detroit. DJ Morrie Carlson asked me to read some copy. I thought I’d flubbed it but after we broke for commercials, he said he thought I was pretty good. “Stay with it.” So I did. Got a job while in High School and summer of graduation, had to make a decision:
Go to college or take the full-time job at WAFT?
Hey - $1.60 an hour? I’ll take radio!
Geek Stuff: I got to do top-of-the-hour legal IDs for WLS and WLW. Never worked for either but thanks to friends, my voice once E-nunciated: “MusicRadio - WLS…Chicago” and: “This is WLW…Cincinnati, Ohio.”
I’ve worked every format (‘cept religious- I applied at WFUR but they took one look at my hair and said: “No openings”) Done: Top 40, MOR, Oldies, Country, AOR, Classic Rock, All-News, Disco, Urban….and most recently, AAA for the best of them all - KFOG.
I’ve worked public affairs and news.
I produced/engineered the Gospel Tones Hour. (live gospel music) Ed & Joan’s Polka Show and Cita Musicale too.
Did traffic, continuity, production and even filled in for Sally (receptionist) at WSAI.
Been a MD and a PD.
Did mornings, middays, afternoons, evenings and….my favorite shift…overnights.
Once spent the night with ABC Broadcast Standards and Practices…and her husband. Used to call the overnight jock at ZZM and win his contests. Bev Bevans cruised me in the WSAI lobby. KSFX on Polk Street just upstairs from the Giraffe – WELCOME TO SF!!! And how about them Chocolate Chip Cookies at KFOG?
HooBoy. Too many stories----
Worked with board ops, record turners, producers. But always best – alone in the studio picking my own music and running my own board. Proud to say: Done it all and loved almost every minute of it.
Favorite part of the job? Running that control board. It’s like flying a plane - except nobody gets hurt when you crash. And I HAVE crashed!
But - to sit down, play music, talk one-on-one with listeners…and get paid for it - that is one fine job. And - yes….I can make comparisons. I’ve also worked as a house painter and movie theater popcorn boy/projectionist.
Lemme tell ya - Radio is the best.
And so….Thank You.
Fogheads and The Family at KFOG. I hope you’ll miss me.
So – now it’s official. Do me ONE favor. Between now and “last day” – let’s NOT get gooey. Deal?
OK. Wanna see a picture? Say “Yes!”
Larry took this back in….’72 was it? I thought it was a great shot but couldn’t talk the PD into using it. Me thinks he thought it was a little too….well, I’m not sure what he thought it was a little too of -
Anyway(s) – while I still have this forum, I want to share the picture and credit the photographer.
email: dmorey@kfog.com
View Photos from the Announcement and Champagne Toast
Audio from the Morning Show Announcement - Fogheads React
Ben Fong Torres interview with Dave Morey (San Francisco Chronicle Datebook 10.19.08)
-Photo by Larry Vollink
Dave's Blog: 08.06.08 - Behind The Scenes…. MEET LINDSEY AND HEATHER – The Continuity Kids.
Lindsey’s A-L…
And Heather’s M-Z!
Let’s see if they’re ready for our visit.
Oops. Heather is texting. We’ll wait till she’s done.
Here’s some background: Continuity. That means commercials. No – they don’t sell them. Lindsay and Heather make sure that once the spots are sold we get the commercials in-house to air. They work with the salespeople, the advertising agencies and the KFOG production people to make sure the correct spots are in-studio and ready to run.
Heather? Ready?
THERE SHE IS.
Lindsey?
Ta-DA!
They’re both really nice to look at and I’ve never seen these guys in a bad mood. Maybe it’s because they’re so young and haven’t had a chance to get cranky yet. They are inspiring people to work with. And they ARE young: Heather - Woodside International High School Class of ’99. Lindsey – Sequoia High 2001 (GO CHEROKEES!!)
Let’s ask some questions.
Hey Lindsey: What’s your favorite TV show right now? “This is a hard one…I LOVE all reality TV…but at this moment I’d have to say…VH1’s “I Love Money” because it’s the trashiest show I’ve ever seen. EVER!! Heather? “I LOVE ALL REALITY TV! DON’T MAKE ME CHOOSE!!!”
How about favorite garbage food?
Heather: “Good Ol’ Burger and Fries” Lindsey: “Hot Tamales….the candy.”
Role models. Who and why.
Lindsay: “My Dad. I hope one day to be able to impact people the way he did.” Heather: “Grandma. She’s an all-around incredibly strong woman. And Kathy Griffin, the comedian. She says and does what she wants…and she’s hilarious.”
OK you guys….next question. Oh. Wait. Phone call from a KFOG Account exec. It’s a M-Z. Heather takes it.
“Can I get a copy change on….starting yesterday?”
YES!!! KFOG Continuity WILL MAKE IT HAPPEN!!
OK. Next question: Last Live Music you went to.
Lindsey: “Nada Surf.” Heather: “Stone Temple Pilots. AMAZING!”
Best Christmas ever?
Heather: “When I got Barbie’s Malibu Dreamhouse from Uncle Rick and Aunt Martee.” Lindsey: “The one when I FINALLY got my Easy Bake Oven.”
“If I ruled the world….. Lindsey: “All Buffalo Wings would be boneless.” Heather: “I’d have to do something hippy-like....like FREE HEALTHCARE FOR ALL!”
Where might we find you on a typical weekend…..
HOLD IT. Phone call. Lindsey – It’s THE BOSS. Wants to know if you guys want a raise?
NO?
These kids are INTO it!!
OK. Where was we? Oh yeah. Where might we find you on a typical weekend night?
Lindsey: “Drinks and board games.” Heather: “Some random dive bar with some live music.”
Next: “I have ALL of his/her/their songs”
Heather: RAMONES! Lindsey: The Decemberists.
Anything else?
Heather: “Wanna see my penguins?”
“I LOVE penguins. I think they’re the best creatures out there. ESPECIALLY Emperor Penguin chicks. Maybe the cutest things on the planet.”
Lindsey: “This interview is OVER. I must water my tree.”
And that….them….is Lindsey and Heather.
It is an honor and a major pleasure to work with these guys. Always a smile, a good story and NEVER cranky. Rare birds, indeed.
Dave's Blog: 08.01.08 MORNING SHOW LIVE AND LOCAL AT PYRAMID ALEHOUSE & BREWERY
The Crowd:
Tim Hockenberry talks with a Foghead:
Jerry Look-A-Like contest WINNER:
(the guy on the left)
Next Friday – The 21st Amendment (Morning Show Beer Guy’s place.) Details Monday morning.
Here’s some fun from The Washington Post by-way-of George & Peter on the Big Island.
In case you missed it. Here is the Washington Post's Mensa Invitationalwhich once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary,alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply A new definition. The winners are: Cashtration: The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an a--hole. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly. Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't … get it. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.) Karmageddon: It's when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, and then the Earth explodes, and it's a serious bummer. Glibido: All talk and no action. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
Arachnoleptic Fit: The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
heehee?
OK.
THANKS to everyone for the great time this morning. Enjoy the weekend.
Dave's Blog: 07.30.08
All I Wanna Do Is….
….get my DSL fixed and maybe tell someone in charge about the ordeal.
I’m sure we’ve all had a similar experience with “tech support.”
Here’s mine:
Saturday.
Try to get online…it’s a no go. Everything on my end OK. All the modem lights are on. Phone works OK. Call the repair number….slowly make my way through the automated system. A lot of “yes/no” questions. Also frequent reminders that I can get answers to the most frequently asked questions by going online. Waitasecond. Go online to get answers to why you can’t get online?? Remember to ask live tech support person about that. Before I can talk to a real person, the automatic lady will run a line test. “This may take awhile.” A while later: The line tests OK. Have I tried shutting down, unplugging the modem, plugging itYES I HAVE…SEVERAL TIMES! Connecting to tech support. There will be a brief delay.<
A while later: Tech support. And yes, it is India and I have no problem with that. Moe is very helpful. After I describe what’s happening I ask “Is it possible that the problem is OUTSIDE my house? Like YOU guys are having a problem in my area and that should be reported and then it’ll get fixed? Nope. Let’s do this. Let’s try that. Open this and read the numbers and try these numbers and power down and reboot and….
An hour later. He is baffled.
Moe connects me to someone else….not sure where this guy is but we kinda go through the same stuff again. We open this and type in these numbers and shut down and restart and nothing. Hmmm. I ask HIM: “Is it possible that there’s a problem OUTSIDE the house. Like maybe you’re having equipment problems somewhere and you could report it and then it’d get fixed and…. He’ll check. Nope. Let’s try THIS. More clicking, unclicking boxes and entering numbers and shut down and restart and…..taDA! We’re online again!! Hallelujah! A little over 2 hours on the phone but it’s fixed! Thanks!
“We’re sorry for the inconvenience. We appreciate your bus…..”
Later that day: (note: for next part of story…please scroll up. See that paragraph that’s marked with the “>” and “<” symbols? Highlight that section, copy, and paste below.
Never mind. I’ll do it for you.
Try to get on line…no go. Everything on my end OK. All the modem lights are on. Phone works OK. Call the repair number….slowly make my way through the automated phone system. A lot of “yes/no” questions. Also frequent reminders that I can get answers to the most frequently asked questions by going online. Go online to get answers to why you can’t get online?? GOTTA remember to ask live person about that. Before I can talk to a real person, the automatic lady will run a line test. “This may take awhile.” A while later: The line tests OK. Have I tried shutting down, unplugging the modem, plugging itYES I HAVE…SEVERAL TIMES! Connecting to tech support. There will be a brief delay.<
OK. Another tech support guy in India. I explain I’ve just spent 2+ hours trying to get this problem fixed. It was back up for awhile but now it’s down again. Could he check to see if there is an outage in my area?
Nope. No problem on their end.
We do the shutdown, unplug, reboot. We do the box clicking. Check the numbers. Enter new ones. We do all the stuff I did with the other guys earlier. I’m so good at this by now that I can finish his sentences. This irritates him. A little over an hour later he says I need to call repair on Monday and order a new line with a new modem. He starts explaining why….it’s like the difference between a cell phone and a pager and….
I say: “Why was it working earlier this morning? ARE YOU SURE THE PROBLEM ISN’T ON YOUR END??”
He says: “No. I’ve done all the line checks.”
I ask to speak with whoever’s next in line. He doesn’t understand what I mean. I ask him to look at the service report on my earlier call….where I was switched to the guy who seemed to fix it. He says he has no record of that. OK. Can you connect me with someone else? He says “You mean someone in the states??” I’m thinking maybe he’s thinking he’s got a racist on the phone. I say “I don’t know and I don’t care where he or she is. I just want to talk with someone who can GET THIS FIXED. Please connect me with someone else.” He says that won’t do any good. (REALLY. He said that.) He says I’ll have to call the main number on Monday and order a new line and modem.
“You’re telling me that I need a new line and a new modem and I have to wait until Monday and the problem is NOT on your end and there’s no one you can connect me right now with to talk about this a little more?”
“Yes sir. I apologize for any incontinence. We appreciate your….”
Call terminated by me.
Later that day….I’m online again! Briefly.
Then - more later that day:
Automated phone message from my ISP: “Hello! We’re calling about your DSL service. We are aware of the problem and are working on it at this time. We’ll call again when the problem is resolved. We apologize for any inconvenience! We appreciate…”
OK! They know they have a problem!!! Excellent! That’s all I wanted. They KNOW!
(Remember in “The Miracle Worker” when Helen Keller spells “water”?)
BREAKTHROUGH!
Sunday.
I’m out on the bike. Get back about 1P. Messages on answering machine.
1st –Automated message: Hello! We’re calling about your DSL service. We are pleased to report that the problem has been fixed and your service restored. We apologize for any…”
YAY!
Next – “Hello Mr. Morey. This is Josh from online repair. (REAL person leaves a message!!!) WE HAVE BEEN EXPERIENCING A MAJOR OUTAGE IN YOUR AREA AND ARE WORKING ON THE PROBLEM. We will be sending you a new modem….it will arrive on Tuesday. Swap it out with the old one and you’ll be online again. Sorry for any incon….”
Monday.
I CAN get online with old modem. Check my email. Try later – its dead again.
Tuesday. New modem is here. I plug it in….can’t get the “DSL” light to go solid.
Still got that first paragraph on the clipboard? No? That’s OK. I do.
Call the repair number….slowly make my way through the automated phone system. A lot of “yes/no” questions. Also frequent reminders that I can get answers to the most frequently asked questions by going online. I think that’s irony? Go online to get answers to why you can’t get online?? Before I can talk to a real person, the automatic lady will run a line test. “This may take awhile.” A while later: The line tests OK. Have I tried shutting down, unplugging the modem, plugging itYES I HAVE…SEVERAL TIMES! Connecting to tech support. There will be a brief delay.<
Another guy in India. No problem. He checks my line. It’s OK.
“I got this new modem.”
Let’s try this. Let’s try that. He starts asking me about the filters and the line splitter and is the new modem sitting on any electrical equipment and how long is the cable and I finally say: “Your questions are getting dumber. THE PROBLEM IS NOT ON MY END. I WANT SOMEONE TO FIX THIS THING. Can you connect me to someone who can GET THIS THING FIXED?
No.
No?
No. All he can do it get a serviceman out to the house sometime in the next 48 hours.
That’ll work fine. That would’ve worked REALLY fine last Saturday. Book it.
It’s booked. I hope.
Can I get a number to call to complain about the close to 6 hours I’ve spent on the phone over the last 4 days trying to get this thing fixed?
Please hold.
He’s back with another 800 number.
I call….go through the automated voice recognition Q&A….finally get a human. I explain my problem and as politely as possible describe my utter frustration with this whole ordeal.
She says: “I have nothing to do with DSL, sir. I’ll have to transfer you.” Says I: “What??? This is the number the guy at tech support gave me!” She says: “I have nothing to do with DSL. I’ll have to transfer you.” Says I: “Am I going back to India?” She says: “Probably.” Says I: “I don’t want to talk to tech support. I want to talk to customer service.”
She can’t help me. She doesn’t have a number people can call to voice complaints. All she can do is connect me to India…or maybe I’ll get Canada this time. Nothing in the states. Nothing in my neighborhood.
She apologizes for any inconvenience. They appreciate..….
OK. I have every confidence that this’ll be fixed by the end of the week. And it’s the first time I’ve ever had to call my ISP on a repair issue. It’s always worked perfectly.
But….
And that’s my story.
We’re having problems with our website - can’t upload our own blogs right now, so I’ll have to email this to Joe so he can get it on the page. Oh…..wait…..email.
Hmmm.
I’ll just burn it to disc and hand deliver in the morning.
Best -
Dave
UPDATE: Wednesday 2PM. I am back online!! Turns out….THEY upgraded equipment OUTSIDE my house….made my old modem incompatible….then had to do some tweaking at central office to get my new modem up and running.
NICE lady calls to tell me it should be working now. It’s working now. Me: “So this was a problem on your end starting last Saturday?” She: “Yes. One of those we-put-the-cart-ahead-of-the-horse things. We apologize for any inconvenience, We REALLY appreciate your business.”
Next installment: “MEET HEATHER AND LINDSAY”
Dave's Blog: 07.22.08
SUBJECT: AVAILABLE!!!!!
This 198? Honda CRX 2 door SuperSporty hatchback is being offered (over the objections of Mike) by Elin (Mike’s partner) FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME SINCE MIKE TOOK OWNERSHIP sometime back in the 20th century.
100% Original, Unrestored condition!
Clear title, no lien. Beer Cooler in back seat INCLUDED!
OPTIONS:
SUNROOF! (may need some work)
Your passenger will be PROUD to be seen in THE GARBAGE MOBILE!!
Note that much desired surface finish known as “patina.”
AND....
UPGRADED SEAT CUSHIONS!!
More extras….too many to list here!
This vehicle ALMOST made the cut for the 2008 Sausalito 4th Of July Parade!
RELIABLE (so far) TRANSPORTATION. “It’s a HONDA!!”
The story- This is Mike’s car. Mike HATES to drive. He always walks to work (Scrimshaw Gallery, Sausalito.) Whenever they have to use a car, Elin drives them in hers (Acura Integra – 185K miles but no duck tape.) Elin’s car is in for servicing and she’s had to drive “The GarbageMobile” to work. She’s almost getting used to it when she stops to get some gas in Corte Madera. Elin fills up the G.M. and slips the attendant a 50 dollar bill. He looks at her….looks at the car….looks at the 50….and refuses to take it. He thinks it’s counterfeit.
NOBODY who drives around in a car like that could be packin’ a REAL 50 dollar bill.
Right?
OK. That’s the last straw--- The plan – keep the Acura for a year or so more…joint custody….then Elin buys a new car and Mike gets the Acura.
Meanwhile…The ORIGINAL Garbage Mobile…a SAUSALITO TREASURE….IS NOW available.
Driver NOT included.
Disclaimers: No written or implied warranty. Probably won’t pass Cal Smog test. Roll of paper towels IS included. Make sure you carry valid credit card when trying to gas up. Don’t try to donate to charity – they won’t take it. State of California may pay you 600 bucks to get it off the road.
Meet original owner at his shop in Sausalito. Scrimshaw Gallery. Or – 5ish…Elin and Mike can be found surrounded by friends at Angelino, Sausalito.